Joe Stead – The Ramblings of an old Codger. Volume Twenty One - June 2002.

It’s nice to able to start with some good news – well good for me anyway. The RNLI have decided they would like to put my recording of Valparaiso round the Horn into their catalogue. This means that the CD will be available in all RNLI stores around Great Britain and will also be sold through their quarterly magazine. The booklet inside the package has been upgraded to include all the words with brief passages about the shanties involved. It obviously means having a third pressing done with increased printing costs, but this should be offset by the first order. My initial thanks must go to Bob Bulgin in Port Isaac who was kind enough to introduce me and to Brian Williams of the RNLI for having faith in the product. I’m flattered insofar that the RNLI only release two new CD’s each year and to have been chosen is indeed an honour. I will be making a donation to the RNLI for all my own sales and will become an agent for the RNLI.

Are you one of those poor misguided souls who watches Coronation Street? Well look out for another poor misguided soul sitting outside the beer tent on Jubilee Day. It was an interesting experience – three days on the set of Corry. The majority of the cast are friendly if not slightly juvenile, but I was not impressed with Fred the Butcher. An excellent actor he may be, but nice personality? I’ve met friendlier and better mannered rotweillers.

If it’s not bad enough having a right wing Labour Party there now appears to be a further surge towards the right and not only in Britain but on the Continent as well. It is a disturbing trend brought about no doubt by the influx of Asian refugees into Europe. It is difficult to imagine where this will all end. On the streets the football violence is growing again with certain clubs still having a less than desirable following. Millwall and Cardiff City both thankfully missed out on promotion to higher divisions. Having Millwall in the Premiership would have been a huge headache that none of us needed. I was tempted to suggest that both these teams should be sent to the Ryman League until their supporters evolve into human beings. However it would of course have been grossly unfair to all the little clubs in the Ryman League to have these hooligans thrust upon them and would doubtless have resulted with many of the miscreant supporters joining forces with another league club instead. The thought of Millwall supporters following my beloved Charlton would have been too much to bear. Of course true Millwall supporters would never support Charlton any more than Charlton supporters would follow Millwall, but the hooligans will follow any side for the sake of a fight. It is an amusing and mysterious scenario that they knock seven bells out of each other in England and then stand side by side in Europe and the rest of the World to fight the supporters of other nations. It is a concept that I find difficult to understand.

Another concept I find difficult to understand is that President Bush was made aware of a likely terrorist strike by air a few weeks before September 11th and did absolutely nothing about it. It is now apparent that throughout last year the FBI and CIA picked up hard evidence that Bin Laden was training pilots and planning a major airborne attack. The French intelligence service passed on clear warnings and Jordan and Morocco are also supposed to have advised America about forthcoming attacks. But none of the warnings were co-ordinated because there was a monumental lack of grip at the top of government. Now Bush is travelling around Europe telling us to pull our socks up. Meanwhile his party is rallying around him claiming that they were not sufficiently informed to determine what form this strike would take. So what did they expect militant Muslim extremists to do? Drop leaflets over New York or drive a plane into a building? The Americans (and I’ve had a few who have corresponded with me) who claimed that we must leave everything to our leaders as our governments know what they are doing must now be having considerable doubts.

But what is the man (or woman come to that) in the street supposed to believe?

Here is a pretty good example of how the truth can be told, without telling the exact truth. President Bush visited Berlin in late May. CBS News reported that “President Bush was in Berlin where he had been met by thousands of young protesters!” That was all that was said in the news excerpt that I saw on CBS. Now what are Americans supposed to determine from the term ‘thousands’, and why was he there? News in Britain stated that “President Bush accompanied by 600 (yes six hundred) bodyguards flew into Berlin today to be met by 20,000 (yes twenty thousand) protesters, the whole thing being overseen by 10,000 (yes ten thousand) armed German riot police”. According to our news he was there to garner support for waging war with Iraq. Does the American in the street know much about this? You can bet their last bottom dollar they don’t! And if they are simply not told it’s hardly their fault.

Subject: Letter from Deepak Chopra

The Deeper Wound

As fate would have it, I was leaving New York on a jet flight that took off 45 minutes before the unthinkable happened. By the time we landed in Detroit, chaos had broken out. When I grasped the fact that American security had broken down so tragically, I couldn't respond at first. My wife and son were also in the air on separate flights, one to Los Angeles, one to San Diego. My body went absolutely rigid with fear. All I could think about was their safety, and it took several hours before I found out that their flights had been diverted and both were safe.
Strangely, when the good news came, my body still felt that it had been hit by a truck. Of its own accord it seemed to feel a far greater trauma that reached out to the thousands who would not survive and the tens of thousands who would survive only to live through months and years of hell. And I asked myself, Why didn't I feel this way last week? Why didn't my body go stiff during the bombing of Iraq or Bosnia? Around the world my horror and worry are experienced every day. Mothers weep over horrendous loss, civilians are bombed mercilessly, refugees are ripped from any sense of home or homeland. Why did I not feel their anguish enough to call a halt to it?
As we hear the calls for tightened American security and a fierce military response to terrorism, it is obvious that none of us has any answers. However, we feel compelled to ask some questions. Everything has a cause, so we have to ask, What was the root cause of this evil? We must find out not superficially but at the deepest level. There is no doubt that such evil is alive all around the world and is even celebrated.
Does this evil grow from the suffering and anguish felt by people we don't know and therefore ignore? Have they lived in this condition for a long time?
One assumes that whoever did this attack feels implacable hatred for America. Why were we selected to be the focus of suffering around the world? All this hatred and anguish seems to have religion at its basis. Isn't something terribly wrong when jihads and wars develop in the name of God? Isn't God invoked with hatred in Ireland, Sri Lanka, India, Pakistan, Israel, Palestine, and even among the intolerant sects of America?
Can any military response make the slightest difference in the underlying cause? Is there not a deep wound at the heart of humanity?
If there is a deep wound, doesn't it affect everyone?
When generations of suffering respond with bombs, suicidal attacks, and biological warfare, who first developed these weapons? Who sells them? Who gave birth to the satanic technologies now being turned against us?
If all of us are wounded, will revenge work? Will punishment in any form toward anyone solve the wound or aggravate it? Will an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, and limb for a limb, leave us all blind, toothless and crippled?
Tribal warfare has been going on for two thousand years and has now been magnified globally. Can tribal warfare be brought to an end? Is patriotism and nationalism even relevant anymore, or is this another form of tribalism?
What are you and I as persons going to do about what is happening? Can we afford to let the deeper wound fester any longer?
Everyone is calling this an attack on America, but is it not a rift in our collective soul? Isn't this an attack on civilization from without that is also from within?
When we have secured our safety once more and cared for the wounded, after the period of shock and mourning is over, it will be time for soul searching. I only hope that these questions are confronted with the deepest spiritual intent. None of us will feel safe again behind the shield of military might and stockpiled arsenals. There can be no safety until the root cause is faced. In this moment of shock I don't think anyone of us has the answers. It is imperative that we pray and offer solace and help to each other. But if you and I are having a single thought of violence or hatred against anyone in the world at this moment, we are contributing to the wounding of the world.
Love,
Deepak
>website: www.harmonious-living.com


HOWEVER. !

America: The Good Neighbor

Widespread but only partial news coverage was given recently to a remarkable editorial broadcast from Toronto by Gordon Sinclair, a Canadian television commentator. What follows is the full text of his trenchant remarks as printed in the Congressional Record.

"This Canadian thinks it is time to speak up for the Americans as the most generous and possibly the least appreciated people on all the earth. Germany, Japan and, to a lesser extent, Britain and Italy were lifted out of the debris of war by the Americans who poured in billions of dollars and forgave other billions in debts. None of these countries is today paying even the interest on its remaining debts to the United States. When France was in danger of collapsing in 1956, it was the Americans who propped it up, and their reward was to be insulted and swindled on the streets of Paris. I was there. I saw it. When earthquakes hit distant cities, it is the United States that hurries in to help.
This spring, 59 American communities were flattened by tornadoes. Nobody helped. The Marshall Plan and the Truman Policy pumped billions of dollars into discouraged countries. Now newspapers in those countries are writing about the decadent, warmongering Americans. I'd like to see just one of those countries that is gloating over the erosion of the United States dollar build its own airplane.
Does any other country in the world have a plane to equal the Boeing Jumbo Jet, the Lockheed Tri-Star, or the Douglas DC10? If so, why don't they fly them? Why do all the International lines except Russia fly American Planes?
Why does no other land on earth even consider putting a man or woman on the moon? You talk about Japanese technocracy, and you get radios. You talk about German technocracy, and you get automobiles. You talk about American technocracy, and you find men on the moon- not once, but several times-and safely home again. You talk about scandals, and the Americans put theirs right in the store window for everybody to look at. Even their draft-dodgers are not pursued and hounded. They are here on our streets, and most of them, unless they are breaking Canadian laws, are getting American dollars from ma and pa at home to spend here.
When the railways of France, Germany and India were breaking down through age, it was the Americans who rebuilt them. When the Pennsylvania Railroad and the New York Central went broke, nobody loaned them an old caboose. Both are still broke. I can name you 5,000 times when the Americans raced to the help of other people in trouble. Can you name me even one time when someone else raced to the Americans in trouble? I don't think there was outside help even during the San Francisco earthquake. Our neighbors have faced it alone, and I'm one Canadian who is damned tired of hearing them get kicked around. They will come out of this thing with their flag high. And when they do, they are entitled to thumb their nose at the lands that are gloating over their present troubles. I hope Canada is not one of those."
Stand proud, America!

By the way, just to get back to sanity, my little dog Jessie (a cocker cross) reached her 16th birthday on May 13th, not however before suffering a quite severe stroke at the very end of April. Thankfully she is now fully recovered, still chasing sticks and still following my every footstep; which is not always helpful. My good friend Jerry Mellonie however was not so lucky………

OBITUARY
Jerry Mellonie was born on June 19th forty nine years ago. He died in the Halifax Hospital in the early morning of Friday May 3rd after suffering two heart attacks which came almost simultaneously. A man of extremely high intelligence he dropped out of teacher’s training college to become a booking clerk for British Rail but later went into the licensing trade managing both The Dolphin Public House in Robin Hood’s Bay and The Puzzle Hall Inn in Sowerby Bridge. His funeral was attended by more than 200 people which is an indication of the popularity of the man. He was well represented by the ‘folk fraternity’ a form of music he deeply loved but which for some strange reason was not represented in the service. Folkies in attendance with myself were Bill Leader, Stanley Accrington, Neil Kimber, Tonky Hepworth, Tim Moon, Padaer Long and John Adams amongst others. Jerry owned a narrow boat – so perhaps it was fitting that his cortege was along the Calder and Hebble Canal on a narrow boat rather than in the customary hearse. He had that uncanny knack of being able to say something extremely witty that you wanted to say as well – the problem being that he was saying it whilst you were still thinking of it! I spent many enjoyable evenings in the company of Jerry and well recall that he came on tour with my wife and I on one occasion visiting a number of folk clubs whilst also taking in Shep Woolley’s 50th birthday celebration. He loved the countryside and took great pleasure showing us around The New Forrest and one particularly strange drinking hole – probably one of the smallest pubs in Britain. Jerry had entered hospital with a viral complaint of the heart, was not on the danger list and was expected to be completely cured within 2-4 weeks. He had been a heavy smoker however and I have to wonder whether the sudden deprivation of nicotine, which is imposed on smokers when entering hospitals, was the route cause of his death. Jerry is the second person I’ve known who has died under these circumstances in the last 6 months. With 200+ people at the celebration service for his life it is an understatement to say that he will be greatly missed. In Sowerby Bridge it is truly an end of an era.

Some very interesting letters this month and a couple of amusing stories to end – so I’ve laid over ‘Ramblings Past’ till next month.

LETTERS
Joe
Ah, you have raised the issue of preserving those rooted, (often) green things. I share your lack of interest in plants, but have raised the issue of guitar buyers who prize Brazilian rosewood. My letter to Acoustic Guitar magazine was published, along with an answer in June 2002's issue. But here's a commentary from the column I keep on our website. (Should we be singing about species preservation while playing Brazilian rosewood guitars? I think I wrote to you about this issue some months back.)
My letter to Acoustic Guitar Magazine did get published (June 2002), though it has been somewhat modified, as has the original answer, which was sent to me some weeks back. The original letter questioned the notion of having virtually killed off a species of tree for the sake of having pretty furniture and nice sounding guitars. And, if we continue to buy vintage guitars made of Brazilian rosewood, aren't we perpetuating species extinction? The published answer is, 'yes,' because mahogany is next in line. It's sorrowful to see animal species decline and eventually disappear, though I could do without killer bees. Saving trees seems a bit less determined. We're trying to save the remaining sequoias, and you should take a quick drive to check out the few tall Carlisle Pines here in Concord, Massachusetts to see what is worth preserving. Maybe guitar manufacturers ought to develop their own policies instead of relying on mere legalities established by federal governments, and maybe we guitar players should express ourselves by raising questions about guitar building materials and their renewabilty. You'd sure be boycotting tambourines made from seal skin.
Happy birthday. Don't take it too badly. No one really knows what
wisdom is, or isn't!
David Fishken (USA)


Joe:
I'm finding that your "Ramblings" stick with me for a few days after I read it. I've noticed for myself that when someone spews negativity on me, it sticks with me longer than a compliment. I don't know if that's just me, but I'd guess not. Our local folk scene has an open mike that is broadcast on the radio. As a matter of fact, you could listen over the www if you had a mind to. Anyway, there's a good deal of paranoia generated in that scene about who garners approval, and who doesn't. There's a young component, and an older component that are somewhat at odds with each other. The older players tend to be more traditional, and folky and the younger players are generally rock based musicians
I've just accepted that there's going to be some negativity here and there, and to try to make SOME attempt to avoid being part of creating that atmosphere, although I've been guilty of being small and mean on one occasion or another (as much as I hate to admit it). Kristi (my wife) is a member of a 20s-30s jazz group. They get plenty petty and mean towards each other from time to time. Of course I don't get involved there, other than I get to talk to Kristi about them. I probably imagine more negativity than I actually experience. We all crave approval. Even my friends who I see as being very successful and highly approved of have their feelings of paranoia, often rightly so as people are commonly jealous of success.
We are looking forward (VERY MUCH) to our tour, meeting lots of people, seeing lots of history, and having a great adventure. Let's just hope you're never the last folksinger on earth Joe!
Sincerely, Steve Nebel (USA)


Hi Joe
I want to add a comment to your ramblings...print if you want...
Many years ago I was booked by a 'folk club' full of folk in Truro. (A well known cathedral town still run by very religious people who will not allow licenses for rave type music for younger people because it is not worthy enough to them.) The 'organiser' of the 'folk' club knew my style well enough.
I dragged the gear down the side of the pub to the back room, set up and started to sound check. In comes the 'organiser' and announces "you can’t use that EQUIPMENT here, we don't have amplified music here, this is a folk club". I protested that they knew I used a small pa and that I could not do the gig without it as I used a little electronics with my guitar sound and anyway I had a streaming cold and my voice was croaky and would need to be amplified to be heard. They and two 'resident musicians' insisted that amplified music was not 'folk music' and so not feeling well enough for a battle about the definition of 'folk' music I gave in...packed up...and went home. I’ve heard so many battles about this same issue in 20 years. What a strange inner sanctum of exclusive people with narrow definitions of music many of the folk clubs became. Then in the eighties they all got national about the need to preserve the tradition. Now they are plugged into every financial grant they can find.
Ten years later the same two 'resident' 'musicians' came up to an engineer at a folk festival near Truro asking him for ...
1. a PP3 battery for his violin effects unit...and
2. a jack to jack lead for their chorus pedal unit.
I laughed inside VERY LOUDLY. They did not recognise me as I had short hair and no beard which had been all over me for the previous 12 years. I was the engineer. They were crap, unprofessional and out of tune. Audience members left in droves. Stuff their narrow hypocritical attitudes...I promoted hundreds of gigs around Cornwall from 1975 to the current day. The emphasis is always on tolerance and a wide and inclusive definition of acoustic based music. I get regular emails and letters from people all around the globe who have reconnected with me via my website and many of them comment on 'the fantastic and magical night' they had at one of the many gigs I ran in the fields or on the cliffs or in the village halls that all allowed families with children to attend.
Recently I have been to a couple of 'Arts in the community' type workshops and have spotted some 'folkies' who have made community their issue and have weadled themselves into a paid position with a title so they can pontificate about 'folk' music and dictate a lot of what goes on in their area. Again they seek to be plugged into every financial grant they can find and get titles to please themselves with. If they don’t personally like you then there is no chance of a gig in 'their' area. I am pleased that 20 years ago I started to become a musician with a wider brief that has served me well. I still love folk music but can never forget the stupid narrow attitudes I met here in Cornwall where I have lived for 32 years. I do not make my living from 'folk clubs' anymore. Now I live from my music commissions, CD's and interesting gigs. The best folk music is not in the clubs it’s out on the street and down in the slums and out in the fields inside tepees and tents. (Yes we still have slums in Britain). Stuff the 'folk aristocracy' for their favouritism and exclusive prejudices that have often excluded singer/songwriters. Did the writers of those 'traditional' songs get the same flack? If a song is good it will survive but it does not mean you cannot write your own expression about a contemporary issue surely? It may not pass as a song which will survive for 200 years but that does not mean you cannot write it or that others will not enjoy it.
I must be crap as I never get booked in Cornwall but I still run occasional local gigs and they are always sold out. I am told I am "too electric"..."not folky enough"...."won’t get past the Cornish Mebyon Kernow mafia" etc etc. This is mostly because I run eclectic music gigs in unusual places and encourage a wide range of art performances and styles.
Well, there are more important things to do. I’m acting contemporarily about today’s issues. The Camelford Water Poisoning where we are fighting for justice when 20,000 were fed 20 tons of Aluminium Sulphate in Sulphuric Acid in 1988 is more important to me than singing about issues that no-one can affect because they happened 200 years ago. (see www.environmental-assistance.org). That’s the nub of it I believe. I write songs that are about now not yesterday. I pin my flag to the mast of the ship I am on, not the one that sailed by 200 years ago. It’s harder work and unsung but far more valid. You never know what a song can do if it is relevant to today’s issues. It’s so safe to sing about the past. Still at least you can get a gig in a 'folk' club if you do. Onwards...time is short on a very small and frail planet.
Keep the debates raging Joe...we all need to communicate more....one dream...one world.
Nigel Mazlyn Jones

Hi Joe,
Re your ramblings 20 and no funny story to end with, here is a "thought for the day": "Life at work is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. Some monkeys are climbing up, some down. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes."
Regards
Ray Burgess


Finally a round robin letter from Hamish Birchall to Roger Watson that came to me via Alan Castle and Lawrence Long. Whilst it was not addressed to me I reprint it here because of its importance to the folk music industry in general and the writer very obviously wants the information circulated. Hamish Birchall is leading the campaign for revising the PEL rules.

Dear Roger
Yesterday I attended a meeting with John Tiffney of the Local Government Association (LGA) to discuss entertainment licensing reform. Mr Tiffney represents the LGA on this subject when lobbying central Government on behalf of local authorities. While I found him approachable and genial, he made these extraordinary, and illuminating claims:
* There is no tradition of folk music in pubs in England and Wales.
* The low take-up of PELs in England and Wales was simply a reflection of low public demand for live music.
On both points he rejected my suggestion that the uniquely restrictive and costly licensing regime and years of heavy-handed enforcement might be partly responsible. The LGA is a powerful lobbying agency for local government. Many in the Department for Culture, Media and Sport still give credence to these LGA views about PELs and their effect on live music. I do not mind if you wish to broadcast this more widely to the various folk web discussion groups.
While I don't want to encourage knee-jerk responses, I think it is important that folk musicians seek confirmation of these views directly from the LGA. Brian Briscoe is Chief Executive, Chris Butcher deals with cultural policy issues. The address is:
Local Government Association
Local Government House
Smith Square
London SW1P 3HZ

Hamish Birchall


FUNNY BITS.

What makes life 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving 103%? Here's a little maths that might prove helpful.
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H A R D W O R K ( 8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11) = 98%
K N O W L E D G E (11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 ) = 96%
But,
A T T I T U D E (1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 ) = 100%
And,
B U L L S H I T ( 2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 ) = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.


THE AXIS OF EVIL
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be far more evil than the Iran-Iraq-North Korea Axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address. Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.
"An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake."
THE AXIS PANDEMIC
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered. Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs.
Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries That Be Allowed to ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.
While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.


PERSONAL GROWTH
I was having an out-of-body experience and almost astral-travelled away yesterday, so I grounded myself and got centred with the help of my spirit guides and then the phone rang. Sensing the negative vibrations, I threw the I-Ching and checked my numerology chart, nearly having a primal, but my energy was too blocked. So I did some bioenergetics and self-parenting, took some flower essences and ate an organic oat bran ginseng muffin, but my inner child wasn't feeling nurtured yet. To fix this, I had a Rice Dream Frozen Pie, which, of course, made me hyper, so I did the relaxation response technique I had just learned at the Self Healing Angst Tree Defoliating Centre while listening to my subliminal tapes. But that left me feeling depersonalised, so I did some polarity work, foot reflexology, and past life regression, then rebirthed myself, and called Moon Beam, my body worker, to make an appointment for a Shiatsu/ Reiki/Rolfing /Feldenkreis/Swedish/Japanese deep tissue massage. Unfortunately, she flaked out and never returned my call, so I decided to energise my crystals and do some positive imagery because all my visualisation techniques and affirmations made my space feel invaded. So to get empowered, I got a psychic reading from Mother Heart Love around the issue of my assertiveness so I could feel my radiance and have some energy for my psycho callisthenics and inversion swing before my harmonic brain wave synergy session. This made me more focused for my actualisation seminar holistic healing class and dream workshop. This in turn made me clearer for my Gestalt behavioural cognitive transpersonal Rechian- Jungian-Freudian-Ericksonian session at the hot springs, but my aura was too weak for my trance channelling group, so I fasted until noon to recharge my chakras. At that point, I sensed my intuition was high and my cycle was focused, so I turned on my ion generator to open up for my Neural Linguistic Programming session. But I needed to have my pyramid recharged before my guided synchronicity meditation, so I got some craniosacral therapy, which aligned me for the fire walk between my tarot card reading and my sensory deprivation tank appointment. But even after all that, I felt what I truly needed was a meaningful relationship to mirror myself, so I went to my personal shaman, and then to my guru. Unfortunately they were no help, so instead I went to the Intensive Whole Life Earth Rebirth Cosmic Expo Symposium Workshop to find someone who really knew what was going on. That didn't help either, so I locked myself in a calcium coated Orgone Box and meditated until 9PM. None of it really worked for me, so I got stoned and drank a six pack of beer -- and dude . . . did I feel right with the world!?

Keep smiling and keep singing,

Joe